Aquaflex
There’s a lot of Pelvic Floor strengthening devices on the market and when retailers are trying to sell them to you, it’s sometimes hard to get an honest view of what’s good, what’s shit and what’s a total Life Changer.
My number one is the AQUA FLEX.
Its discreet, comfortable to wear and has a very handy case to store them in and the bonus is, the case is not flashy enough that your kids or grandkids will be drawn to it! Total bonus!
Ok. So, I bought them on eBay about 6 years ago and I still use them. They were only $59 delivered back then. I was so excited to get them, that I wore them that very afternoon. Looking back, that wasn’t one of my smartest moments.
Aqua Flex are shaped like tampons, you unscrew them and place little weights inside and then tighten them back up. The instructions warn you about over doing it and advise you to start with the small weights and slowly work your way up.
At the time, I was running twice a day, doing heavy weights at the gym and massaging league players, so I decided after all that physical exercise, my box must be able to cope with some serious weight too! I loaded the Aqua Flex up with ALL the weights supplied and inserted it. As the instructions highlighted, your vagina “takes up” the weight once inserted. And she did. She felt good, so good in fact I decided to kill two birds with one stone and take my vagina for a soft sand beach run, so she could workout whilst I did my afternoon cardio. Oh, what a young fool I was.
The first half of my run was fine. I ran from Dee Why beach to the Long Reef Headland on the soft sand and I was having a good time. I could feel my vagina was working hard too as she started to feel like she had her own heart beat. No worries, I thought. She’s just doing her thing and owning the weights.
As I took off up the concrete path leading to the lookout, it happened. For a moment, I thought my body was having me on. It felt like my vagina was having a contraction. You know what I mean. That painful gripping around your lower abdomen and deep inside your bits that your body repeats in waves in the lead up to having a baby! The muscles started to spasm. To be honest, it felt kind of good…but then it started to feel bloody painful. I clenched her and shot up the path. Once at the top, I calmed my breathing and did a little self-assessment.
Could I make it home?
Was that pain deep inside getting worse?
Is there anywhere to take them out?
Do I have time to walk back?
It was getting dark, so I had no bloody choice but to gump it home asap and there’s not exactly any toilets around to remove the weights, except those dodgy ones at Long Reef I won’t let my kids go to.
No. I HAD to get my arse home and fast!
I’m not going to lie, the run back is still etched in my mind and for a while after, every time I looked at my AquaFlex, my pelvic floor quivered with both fear and delight. With every step back along the beach, I could feel the weights move. My core was tensed so bloody tight, that part way home, my abs got cramp and I couldn’t breathe – “Harden up sunshine!” was the tone of my self talk, “Get your arse home and cry about it later!”
Surprisingly I made good time. Maybe it was the fact I wasn’t too keen on having my vaginal weights exit my body in full view of my entire neighbourhood. At the time, I lived right across from the beach, just opposite the Dry Cleaners (its now JB Burgers). I made it to my building and slowly navigated the stairs. With every step, I could feel my vagina opening. “Squeeze bitch! SQUEEZE!!!” When I go in the door, my body relaxed and they shot out like a cannon. My poor box was in trauma. I can honestly say, that she has not been that sore deep inside since I had my son.
So that’s what NOT to do!
Clearly, I get overly excited about things, but I did learn my lesson.
Now I use them around the house. I put them in when I’m cleaning, when I’m cooking, if I have to duck to the IGA (it’s a short walk, nothing too stressful for her). I also wear them when I am doing Pilates or Lynx training on my balcony. All jokes aside, these really work and I highly recommend them.
There are a couple of little warnings though. It’s not wise to use pelvic floor weights whilst you’re menstruating as the muscles are softer and the vaginal area is more sensitive. No brainer really. If you suspect you have a slight prolapse, its best to get the ok from your GP or Gynaecologist before jumping online to purchase these.
Have a look at the manufacturers website www.neenpelvichealth.com for additional information about the product, but the best place to purchase the Aquaflex is on ebay. They range between $45-$65 delivered.
I would also suggest you work your way up to the heavier weights.
No one wants a stressed-out vagina x
